al·ter·ca·tion n. a noisy heated angry dispute; also : noisy controversy

A tough young woman slouches in her seat with a sour expression on her face. She is listening to Ludacris rap profanity at a level not normally used for the inner-ear experience provided by earbuds, but rather more suited to stadium sound-systems. From the polar opposite side of the car one can quite clearly hear the following lyrics: Yeah I think you a superstar wit a ass like that. But this lyric has no real relevance to my story, I mention it purely for entertainment value.

A woman with big frizzy hair and a bitter expression that rivals sourpuss is staring at tough young woman with a look that mixes both disgust and pity with utter disbelief. I see Frizzy assess the situation and she looks to the commuters around her to see if anyone else is as annoyed as she is; to back her up for what she is planning. What I fear. An intervention.

I make the fatal mistake of noticing her notice Hearing Damage and so Frizzy sustains prolonged eye contact with me sending me waves of silent perturbation. I can't look away. I am frozen. I receive her message loud and clear: tough young woman is ruining my hearing AND MY MORNING! We have to do something! I smile a half smile at Frizzy and shrug. To each his own is my motto when it comes to anyone who appears to be of the "I will end you" variety. Best not to look at them the wrong way. Like street smarts, there are certain subway smarts that some people just don't have. Some people like Frizzy.

The car is packed and she is seated across from tough young woman. Every occupant of the subway car is now privy to the musical stylings of Lil' Wayne: now pop that pussy take her to my bedroom and pop that pussy. Well that's just lovely. Really gives Cole Porter a run for his money. Clearly at her breaking point, Frizzy moves stealthily towards TYW and delivers the following seething rebuke: Your headphones are broken and you're giving everyone...you're giving me a headache because of it! There is awkward silence and Frizzy is basically stamping her feet and sneering at TYW. Tough young woman looks as though she is ready to bust a cap and screams: Yeah? Well I'm sorry to hear that lady. Take an Advil and have a nice day BITCH!

Oh no you dit-int.